Ok so where has my little twinnies gone? Because the girls came 14 weeks early I was totally expecting them to stay little so much longer then a typical newborn. Plus they were tiny – come on I thought they would be in 0000 size clothes for aaaggggeees….. But they proved me wrong – especially Hanna! Hanna is now almost 11kgs and in 0/1 size clothes and Riley is 7.5 kgs and in 00 clothes! They both love their food – Hanna a little bit more of course.

This past year has gone so fast I don’t even know where the days have gone. NICU days went slow but weeks went fast.  I’m not really sure how to deal with the fact they are already  13 and a half months old actual or 10 months corrected already. Hanna is cruising around commando crawling and Riley is slowly moving around by rolling and going backwards on her tummy. Next thing I know they will be running around and I’ll need to whip out the backpack leashes for them! Haha

How’s my anxiety these days ? Some days I feel on top of the world – some days I don’t. Some days I wonder if I could start lowering my does of antidepressants to wean myself off them (under DRs guidance) but some days I don’t. I am trying to look after myself day by day so that I can look after my children the best way possible. After the twinnies birthday I thought I would be ok to start working towards coming off my meds but honestly I am not ready. There are too many memories from the girls NICU journey coming up that I feel I need that extra support through re living them  and this is OK! There is no rush to get off them.

If I can get through the last year, I can get through anything…. Next thing I know it will be time to get through 3 teenage girls haha